CASHEL MAISIE McKnight-Syman

'Cashel' is a kind of blue cheese, although this little one may find her name shortened to 'Cash'. Basically, her parents have condemned her to a life of being thought of as smelly and/or a hooker.

EDWARD ALEXANDER SINCLAIR DE CUSANCE Cussans

How many names does one child need?

SERAPHINA ROSE Manners

Almost certainly the child of two old goths, who ought to know that seraphs are just cherubs with a superiority complex.

TAW MONTAGUE LANGSTAFF Ainslie

A lifetime of hearing the words "Your name's WHAT?" beckons for little Taw.

JOLYON IVAN Malin

Jolyon's parents overcompensate for being called 'merely' Lisa and Peter.